Sunday, August 28, 2005

I swear, one of these days I'm going to lose it.

I just got back from Melissas after splurging on stationaries or is it stationeries and I just went ballistic because my parents wont pay for it.

It's such fucked up logic.

I buy clothes with my own money, I understand.
I buy shoes with my own money, I understand.
I buy the little cosmetics that catches my fancy with my money, I understand.
I buy junk food with my own money, I understand.
I buy CRAP with my own money, I understand.

BUT FUCK YOU!!!

YOU, yes fucking you! should godamn pay for my school crap.

I do not swear, I never did. But when I did, I swore at you.

Fuck it, even if you don't care, you can put up with it. I can't. I cannot stand swearing. It makes me feel so vulgar and primitive. It makes me feel so dirty, so filthy and I'm fucking swearing at FUCKING YOU!! MY VERY OWN FUCKING FUCKED UP PARENTS!!

I promised myself that I will not swear no more but yet I still utter these profanities. AT YOU!

Well, for that I thank you...

but

FUCK YOU!!

Who tells me I need to get into some crap university all the time?
Who tells me there's bagillion of dollars at stake depending on if I get into university?
Who screams at me when I messed up on one of my assignments?
Who required an interview that completely shattered my already shattered soul?
Who is never satistfied with my 90's average?
Who is always telling me that some random girl got 98's when she has the asian 6 pack and I had fucking humanitites?

GODDAMN FUCKING YOU!

Who never talks to me?
Who never listens to me?
Who never understands me?
Who never tries?

GODDAMN FUCKING MOTHERFUCKING YOU!

Yes, yet you want me to pay for all my own stuff, claiming its my future and I should pay for my own future, do whatever I want with what I can get.

O really?

THEN SHUT THE FUCK UP!

_____________

Dorcy
Call me Dorce, Dolce, Xi

Im simple	Im deep
Im dumb	Im smart
Im conceited	Im self-aware
Im crazy	Im logical
Im loud	Im quiet
Im unfeeling	Im caring
Im messy	Im lazy

Im everything I love
Im everything I hate.



Restless
10:28a.m.
Home
Sunny
Yellow Tank + Green LaSenza PJs
$230 (69 thongs)
Nothing
Cough Lorenze Lorenge Lozenges
No one
Only Hope
Make plans
Thinking
High School
Kaitai







10/31/2004 - 11/07/2004
11/07/2004 - 11/14/2004
11/14/2004 - 11/21/2004
11/21/2004 - 11/28/2004
11/28/2004 - 12/05/2004
12/05/2004 - 12/12/2004
12/12/2004 - 12/19/2004
12/19/2004 - 12/26/2004
12/26/2004 - 01/02/2005
01/02/2005 - 01/09/2005
01/09/2005 - 01/16/2005
01/16/2005 - 01/23/2005
01/23/2005 - 01/30/2005
03/06/2005 - 03/13/2005
03/13/2005 - 03/20/2005
03/20/2005 - 03/27/2005
03/27/2005 - 04/03/2005
04/10/2005 - 04/17/2005
04/17/2005 - 04/24/2005
04/24/2005 - 05/01/2005
05/01/2005 - 05/08/2005
05/08/2005 - 05/15/2005
05/15/2005 - 05/22/2005
05/22/2005 - 05/29/2005
05/29/2005 - 06/05/2005
06/12/2005 - 06/19/2005
06/26/2005 - 07/03/2005
07/03/2005 - 07/10/2005
07/10/2005 - 07/17/2005
07/17/2005 - 07/24/2005
07/24/2005 - 07/31/2005
07/31/2005 - 08/07/2005
08/07/2005 - 08/14/2005
08/28/2005 - 09/04/2005
09/04/2005 - 09/11/2005
10/02/2005 - 10/09/2005




Past
Shannie
'laine
Mel
Bree
Shar
Miv
Mitri



Image Credit --> Aethereality
Pixels --> Kawaiiness



This is my space to rant, spaz, kill, rampage and mentally masturbate about whatever, whenever I want and whereever I want. No one said that bitching was supposed to be eloquent or pleasant, so if you're offended, I'm sorry, but you made the decision to read what I wrote. To everyone that might or will offended, if I'm still your friend, no matter what I wrote here, I must still love you enough to entertain you every day. I am not without faults, so excuse me if you will, like I excuse whatever I wrote in here about you. What's here stays here, whatever. Copyright © to ME, Dorcy Xi Chen, unless otherwise stated.